So as you can see, my life is back in order (sort of, more to come momentarily) and the internet has magically come back. And yes, for those of you wondering, I didn't have some big fight with Cox or AT&T, I might just be one of those people that is cheap. Might? Okay, I am. And I don't want to pay for internet. So for the last one and a half years of living here, I haven't had to pay for a single penny of internet. How, do you ask? No, I'm not a hacker and mysteriously am able to log into someone else's internet. So don't ask me to do that. It's not going to happen. However, my neighbors over the last year and a half, not one consecutive neighbor either, have always had unblocked internet. So why pay for internet when you can get it for free? There were a few weeks here and there without internet, but I lived. I just went to Panera or somewhere and lived cheaply. And I don't consider it stealing if they don't have it blocked. But that just may be my opinion.
I started January 2nd of this year. And I have definitely learned a lot since I began. We've planned 2 weeks of training and 8 weeks of summer camp since then. I have done financial reports that I never even glanced at in college and have figured out how to do them in less than a day...even if they aren't my favorite thing ever. I have improved my grant writing skills and already have a large grant secured and am working on several more. I didn't think I would ever do those things or want to, but I will do whatever it takes to make this job work. I love it.
I love the people I work with. I love my members, even if they are only here during the summer. I love having Bible studies and worship at work. I love praying before and after meetings. I love that people really care about you.
Yet, they have no idea how many lives they are impacting, how many children look up to them, how many children will have lives changed because of them, or how they are changing mine.
The Bartlesville Members received applause when they entered the theater at the Toy Story 3 midnight opening. They also had their picture taken and were on the news the next evening. They looked awesome! Just hoping all the paint came off...
And volunteering with my OKC members at the Infant Crisis Center here in OKC. You should too! Pics of Tulsa members coming...they just have to be taken first.
I have had several people, mostly Miss Megster, begging for a new blog post. So please forgive me, I will try to do better and I will try to continue to share my life with you. A life that is seemingly returning back to the way my life used to be and to a time when I was much happier. And I do love that feeling. I still have days that the self-confidence levels are completely at a zero. But those days are becoming less and the good days are becoming more...thanks God. And I will continue to pray for wisdom, courage, hope and strength and the knowledge to just understand that God loves me more than anyone ever will, despite how I feel about myself and think about myself.
I am not a person that deals well with change and if you've read my blog previously, you know some of the changes that I have been through over the last 7 years. And these 7 years may have been tough, I can guarantee that I have had the greatest family support and have felt more love than I ever thought possible, even though the hurt is still there. Yet still, as much as those changes may hurt, new opportunities come along that I never thought would be as much of a blessing as they are. God surprises me everyday.
One of my favorite verses is Proverbs 3:5-6. "Trust in the Lord with all of your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take."
I know that I may never understand it all, but this has helped me to get through without knowing the answer. And if you know me, I pretty much have to have an answer to everything. If I ask why?, I expect an answer. That has yet to come and I'm learning that that is okay.
One of the biggest blessings that I have received lately is my new job. It was a change I was definitely excited for, but at the same time, I always doubt what God has in store for me. It's usually months later when I finally decide that this is a life changing experience that I will never forget.
I started January 2nd of this year. And I have definitely learned a lot since I began. We've planned 2 weeks of training and 8 weeks of summer camp since then. I have done financial reports that I never even glanced at in college and have figured out how to do them in less than a day...even if they aren't my favorite thing ever. I have improved my grant writing skills and already have a large grant secured and am working on several more. I didn't think I would ever do those things or want to, but I will do whatever it takes to make this job work. I love it.
I love the people I work with. I love my members, even if they are only here during the summer. I love having Bible studies and worship at work. I love praying before and after meetings. I love that people really care about you.
I must admit that I did however go into this summer a little apprehensive. I was told by dozens of people that I would be completely exhausted and out of my mind this summer. And I am pleasantly surprised. Training was tiring, yes. 17 hour days trying to squeeze in every bit of training with our 50 members, followed up by staff meetings late into the night. And early mornings the next day. But we made it and we learned while we were there that we had a great group of members.
We then divided them into their 3 cities and one staff member spent a week in one of the cities. I went to Bartlesville and spent a week with them in their sites and answering last minute questions they might have about the summer. And I learned in that week how much I was going to love my job this summer. I feel like their mom, even though I may only be a few years older than several of them. And I have realized just within the last day that God has not had some doors open yet because it's just not time. I'm supposed to experience this first and when the time is right, it will happen. But that the two or three things I have been praying for would be impossible at the same time. I have grown to love my members over the last few weeks and we have had some fantastic conversations that both sides are learning from. And I am technically their boss, but in ways, I feel like I have found a great group of friends. I know where to draw the line, but it is a prayer that has been answered.
We then divided them into their 3 cities and one staff member spent a week in one of the cities. I went to Bartlesville and spent a week with them in their sites and answering last minute questions they might have about the summer. And I learned in that week how much I was going to love my job this summer. I feel like their mom, even though I may only be a few years older than several of them. And I have realized just within the last day that God has not had some doors open yet because it's just not time. I'm supposed to experience this first and when the time is right, it will happen. But that the two or three things I have been praying for would be impossible at the same time. I have grown to love my members over the last few weeks and we have had some fantastic conversations that both sides are learning from. And I am technically their boss, but in ways, I feel like I have found a great group of friends. I know where to draw the line, but it is a prayer that has been answered.
They are hilarious, intelligent, loving, creative and love the children at the sites. We couldn't have picked a better group of members for this summer. We have had terrific reviews from site coordinators (this hasn't hardly happened in the past 9 summers) and they say that they are in "Intern Heaven". They finish their tasks on time and make the curriculum even more creative than we asked them to be. They. Are. Fantastic.
Yet, they have no idea how many lives they are impacting, how many children look up to them, how many children will have lives changed because of them, or how they are changing mine.
They not only are they great at their jobs, but they have brought a piece of life back into me that has been missing for so long. And I honestly can't explain it. But I am thankful for them. And I am thankful that God knows what he is doing even if I don't understand it. He is always right and I just need that to stay in my head and my heart and life would be much more simple. But for now, I am happy, I love my job more than words can explain and I feel that my prayers are being answered. Or maybe I just started to listen.
Prayers for my members and staff would be greatly appreciated throughout the remaining six weeks of our camps. And prayers for our children that come to be open to what we are teaching them and to just soak up every bit that the members share with them. These children need our help and our love and our attention. They don't get it anywhere else and as much as it hurts to see them hurting, we know too that we are helping. And that is awesome.
Just a few pics of why my members are so fabulously creative and just amazing. The Bartlesville Members received applause when they entered the theater at the Toy Story 3 midnight opening. They also had their picture taken and were on the news the next evening. They looked awesome! Just hoping all the paint came off... And volunteering with my OKC members at the Infant Crisis Center here in OKC. You should too! Pics of Tulsa members coming...they just have to be taken first. 
This message was to the people of Israel, but I find it very relevant in my life today...
Isaiah 43:4 "Others were given in exchange for you. I traded their lives for yours because you are precious to me. You are honored and I love you.
It reminds me how much God loves me, even when I sometimes can't love myself. And that is why he is precious to me.
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